Negativity isn’t good for me. It’s hard to get out of my mindset when I’ve dug myself so deeply. Reaching the way out is impossible.
I ended the day yesterday in such a negative mindset I didn’t write. I moaned to Dave and friends, my negativity. They tired putting positive spins on things. Usually, I would see the positives. No matter what, that negative cloud couldn’t be broken.
I’m not taking proper care of myself. Yesterday, I was asked, last minute, if I would go for to a 2-hour call. It was a good call but I still said no. I used that time to go out with my mum, walking the dogs.
The closer I got to leave for work, already on my rota, that negative mindset got darker and darker. I moaned at every little thing. It took me a while to get to sleep that night.
I didn’t wanna get up this morning knowing I had a busy day at work. My cloud had turned grey. I’ve still been moaning. I took on extra work, I’m tired and just remembered I have my pack up to sort for tomorrow. Plus a funeral to go to tomorrow.
I’m sat here thinking there’s gotta be more to life than this. I know there is. But when it comes to taking care of myself. I put myself on the back burner. Help others out first and say yes to things I most likely shouldn’t.
I say this needs to change. It does! But saying isn’t enough. I need to do! I need to take care of myself.
What I mean is when I’m asked to do something or be involved in something I need to follow my ground rules of my self-care and love for myself.