Hard conversations. Expressing emotion. Being vulnerable in today's messy world
I had a lovely girly evening with B; a takeaway and a film. Just what we needed. We talked about our weddings too.
I told her Dave and I were talking 2021 for ours. B said she’d better hurry up and decided. She’d want to get married before us. She has thought about 2020. See what D thinks to that one.
He might thank us for getting her arse into gear.
Watched: Annihilation > 2.5 out of 5
The surveyors went into our potential new home yesterday. This morning we got the report to tell us what we already knew. Using my Step-Dad phasing: “Your new home is fucked. But I’ll let you in on a little secret. We can fix it”.
It’s good to be able to do the house to how we want it. It’ll certainly feel like it’s completely ours. We are now waiting on the vendors solicitors to send our draft contract and supporting documents.
We’re back to the waiting again.
I’m very impatient when it comes to this getting our new home.
The financial adviser has told us the lender will take a few days to look at the survey report, then if they’re happy will send us an official offer letter.
I’m glad I know what I’m waiting for rather then waiting and having no idea what’s around the corner.
During 2017 I started to make a list of personal ground rules for myself to live by. I’ve had these written down on My Dreams, Goals and Bucket List page since I’ve thought of them. But they’ve just been sat there.
Whether I have been living by them I couldn’t even say. I’m guilty of forgetting what they even are.
Not really personal than are they?
Here I have 7 ground rules. Reading over them I feel that I am somewhat living by them. But I could be more actively doing so. I feel I need to regularly look to see what they are and if I figure I need to add others, then I should add more.
I know here I’m writing I should do this and I should do that. I don’t want to be doing things I feel I should be doing. Look at ground rule 2; don’t agree to things that don’t resonate with me / I don’t believe in.
I don’t want to have rules I should be following. I want to have these type of things be the sense of the person I am. Get me out of my comfort zone but also being honest and open about who I want to be.
I’ve decided to move the list of ground rules off My Dreams, Goals and Bucket List so that I’ve written about them more on a personal level. As one of my goals on the list is to make personal ground rules, I can now link this post to that goal. Allowing me to refer back to it when I wish.
Dave and I have tried something new to us; Coconut Water. Let’s just say it’s not for us. Since living together we, or should I say I, have been eating healthier. We’re having proper meals and some include veg. My mum tried to force veg down me last year never mind when I was a kid.
This afternoon finally led me to be able to say I FINISHED MY NVQ!! After 11 months I can now say I have a Level 2 in Health and Social Care. For the past 6 months, I’ve been wishing this to finish so I can move jobs.
As we’re going through with a mortgage I’m still unable to change my job. But I’m more accepting of my circumstances.
A tip for filling out forms; make sure you check you have signed and dated all relevant boxes. Dave and I missed a signature each on our Stamp Duty Tax form. Which meant they posted it back to us to sign.
Thankfully, that is now sorted.
We’re now waiting for my Grandad to go to the solicitors in 3 days time to prove who he is. This is due to my Grandparents gifting us monies that have been included in our disposit. We’ll have to see if we have to do anything more next week.
It’s been a week and a half since the house buying has started. Fingers crossed in a months time we’ll have the keys.
I’ve spoken about making a difference before. Whether to animals and/or humans. That is what I feel is my purpose or Dharma in life. Like anyone I have doubts. ‘I’m not good enough’ ‘I don’t have the experience to make a difference’ ‘What can I do?’
Reading the stories of how two people became successful in making a difference thought their businesses give me a heart-warming feeling. Reading a person’s experience of getting to make that difference by starting with nothing and being true to themselves; fills my heart up with love and courage. Reminding me I can make a difference; let’s go all out, to the world. To be able to leave a legacy for after I’ve gone.
Reading the Soul of Leadership by Deepak Chopra has given me a sense of awareness that I have to allow synchronicity and flow into my life. I shouldn’t force things on myself. That I’ll know the right path and how to help when I am ready. That the world isn’t full of coincidences but it’s the world of synchronicity at work.
This time last year I needed to be in control and have control over the things in my life and what I do. Forcing things to happen or be a certain way. I’m now accepting of slowing down. I feel that I’ll come across opportunities and people in my life that’ll help me and be apart of my values. I have to recognise them as such and not let them fall through my fingers
Can someone please explain to me why the months are going by so fast? I’m still amazed that it’s another month gone. We are now starting the sixth month of 2018. Half of the year is nearly coming to an end.
May has been a very busy month for me. Thankfully, we did have a trip to Wales with friends. That was a wonderful week; it was much needed. May has also found us house hunting. We got to viewing number two and fell in love. We are currently week 3 in the process of buying it.
Fingers crossed the end of June will bring us having a date for the collection of keys or already having them.
Health wise I have been generally well in myself. I am getting off my anti-depressants. Only having them once or twice a week just to finish them off. I had my blood test re-done to find my Potassium levels are back to normal. This past week I have been more tired but I have been pushed at work. By the end of June and for July I’ll have an easier time of it.
My mum and I have had to start being more hands-on with caring for my Grandma as well. She has Dementia but it’s her physical abilities that are declining quickly. As my Grandad is caring for her 24/7 we are going in to sit with her and to provide morning care to give my Grandad a break. We are currently searching for a care company to be able to provide this support 7 days a week so everyone can have a break. Then we’ll go in and sit with her while my Grandad has time to himself.
This month also brought around my NVQ finishing. It has taken 11 months but I can finally say it is complete. I have also completed 2 out of 4 modules for my Life Coaching qualification.
I was also completing steps towards my goals; below you can see a chart to see how much of each I have done throughout May. Last night I was thinking that I am now actively doing pieces towards my goals that I feel writing each down in my diary and completing a chart at the end of the both isn’t as important to me any more.
Because of this, the chart below will be my last one. At the end of the day, I know when I have or haven’t completed steps towards my goals. I write about them regularly in my journaling, that I feel I am able to gauge how I am going towards the goals I am focusing on at the time.
June is here.
What will it bring?
For me currently, the following is planned:
That is a busy month of things to come. Of course, I have work around all that too. Work to me isn’t important enough to be included as that is just something I need to do.
There you have it. My month of May rounded up in a post. What did May bring for you?
We were able to do something towards the house buying. The welcome pack from the solicitors arrived. We had a lovely time filling out forms this evening. We’ve the last parts of them to do over the next few days. Plus our identity for them.
We were also to complete the agreement for the surveyors. They’re getting carried out in 2 weeks time.
I’ve been looking at furniture. I like so many things. It’ll be interesting what we end up getting when we know measurements. It’s gonna be an expensive few months. That’s for sure.
I had my final NVQ observations. But I’m afraid I can’t say I’ve finished. I now have to wait 6 days for our remote call to finish everything off. But that is supposed to be it!!! It’ll be another thing off the list.
Watched: Licence to Kill > 3.5 out of 5
