Health, Life, Mental Health, Writing

A Monday

I’m finding it difficult to describe how I’ve been today. It’s been good. It hasn’t been terrible. I’ve done things towards my goals.

I even did some yoga. It’s been nearly two weeks since I last did any. Yoga for Zombies by Yoga with Adriene was such a release. Especially when letting my arms fall with momentum.

I don’t know maybe I’m getting to a point where I’m wearing myself out again. After my in and outs with work today I’m glad it’s over.

I enjoyed my last hours of travelling. I finally found Demi Lovato – Tell Me You Love Me album. It was a good job it was just me in the car. Saves others their hearing. Certainly, don’t have Demi’s voice. O well, I’m not sorry. I love the album.





Personal Development, Relationship, Stratejoy, Writing

One Project at a Time

As part of The Holiday Council 2016, I was able to access the Insiders section to the year. I may have had it for 11 months but I’ve only just started to listen to them. I finished the 2011 guest interviews. One of which was with Ev’Yan who focuses on sex and sexuality.

Seeing as my relationship with sex isn’t good. It scares me since I started getting pain during. The thought of trying again causes me to panic, have a sense of dread. It’s been a couple of months since we last had sex.

Finding Ev’Yan through The Holiday Council has been great timing. I feel like if I listened to this guest interview at the beginning of the year I wouldn’t have connected as much to it as I do now.

Looking at her blog, she is being honest about everything. She even does an e-course to help others find themselves to enjoy sex. It’s something I’m considering.

This course and The Courage Life Program are two I’d like to do. But I will have to wait until 2018. November/December brings a new year of The Holiday Council.

I’m trying to focus on one project at a time. As I struggle to focus on one thing at a time, never mind big projects. I think I’m gonna add a new ground rule. To try and build the habit. I have 4 ground rules now.

Rule 4.jpg

Do you have any personal ground rules?

Family, Friendships, Life, Writing

That Responsible Adult Feeling

I feel like a responsible adult tonight. Yesterday, I stopped doggie sitting my two for my parents. I’m now at my in-laws’ doggie sitting their two. It happens to be my weekend to work. Dave worked today too.

It is also the Halloween night out in town. Due to my working hours, my chance to go out wasn’t in the cards. Due to Dave working today as well, he would have missed it to look after the dogs. Seeing as they were at home alone while we were working.

So that Dave could go out and the dogs would still have some company. I decided to stay over at my in-laws’ tonight. When on a normal weekend to work I wouldn’t have done. After dropping some off into town. I’m back with some doggies due to go to sleep.

I do feel wide awake and up for going out. But when my alarm goes off I won’t be thinking that or thanking myself.

To all that had enjoyed celebrating Halloween. Did you dress up? What as?

Friendships, Life, Writing

Halloween Celebration

When your fiance says “I’m really am bonkers” – you know he’s drunk. I’m not a big drinker but tonight I had a little. I’m not drunk. I’m not sober either. There is alcohol in my system for the first time in months.

Tonight was the gathering for Halloween at my friends D & B’s house. There is a night out tomorrow but myself and another friend couldn’t make that so she did this house gathering so we could see the decorations.

I’ve never really been a big Halloween fan. Wasn’t brought up as it being a celebration. But I enjoyed tonight. The decorations were tame according to B. She has loads more she could have put up. Would love to see that whole lot up.

I enjoyed myself and glad I let go. Yep, he’s definitely drunk. He’s fallen asleep before I finished writing this.


Depression, Mental Health, Writing

Facebook Goodbye Message

My mind for the past few days has been thinking of a goodbye post for my Facebook. I want to remove my account but I want to have the last post so to speak. Today, I took the time to think about what to write.

I looked on the internet for inspiration. This is what I came up with:

After 9 years on Facebook, I am saying goodbye. Memories have been made but as of the 1st Nov I am clicking the delete button. Moving to focus from news feeds to the real world. Thank you for being apart of my ‘social media’ world. I hope to see your smiles living life.

What do you think?

Life, Mental Health, Writing

More Settled being on my Own

Tomorrow will be my last full day before my parents come back from Florida. I’ve coped very well at being at home, doggie sitting, for the last 7 days. The post-it notes for the animals have been helpful.

I have the dog routine down anyways having looked after them on a normal basis. For my step dad’s Axolotl, it’s been a Godsend. Helped me remember which days I’m supposed to be feeding him.

Did nearly miss getting the bin out this morning. There’s me, sat on the toilet when I heard the bin truck. What had I not done? Put the bin out! There’s me, rushing, dragging the bin from the back of the house. In my bed socks and PJs with the floor wet from the rain. All for the bin to be emptied. Thankfully 5 minutes before they came to my street.

I’m usually quite good at getting the bin out the night before. Last night clearly wasn’t my night.

Despite the rushing to get the bin out. I’ve felt better on my own this time around. I think working and the responsibility of the animals has helped me not feel as lonely. Don’t get me wrong, I still had moments of loneliness. At those times I was able to hug a doggie.

It’s been good to have the house to myself. I’ll be glad when they get home though. I do miss them.


Communication: BSL

Communication is the key to most day to day interactions. Working in care. It’s vital.

I completed my Module 5 of my NVQ today. Communication. Clearly a big topic. Most of the things in the module I knew as common sense. Manners, I’ve learnt growing up. But reading all the information made me more mindful this evening completing my bed calls.

I noticed on one, I was speaking fast. It’s something I’ve tried to slow down before.  Mindfulness communication.

The module provided me with many links to further information. One of which was the British Sign Website. As learning sign language is a goal of mine, I was interested. I found they did an introductory BSL course online.

I’ve looked for courses before on and off a few times. But never one I could commit too or afford. But this one was £19.99 for a year’s access to complete.  The course comprised of 8 lessons. As they have had good reviews, I’ve decided to give it ago.

I’ve enrolled and done the first step to learn sign language. I’m not setting myself a deadline other than the year access I have. I want to take my time and really absorb it all.