Goals, Health, Life, Writing

Fierce Self Love: Part 1

One of my blackboard tasks is Loving my Body. It’s not a task that can be just ticked off. I really need to be loving my body wholeheartedly for this to be true.

When I think about loving my body, it’s not just my body but myself as a whole. Surely, if I can’t love myself, I can’t love my body. Loving myself unconditionally. Loving myself fiercely.

I want to be able to see the love for myself each time I look into the mirror. See my flaws, not as flaws, but what makes me who I am. That my nose is perfect in every way as it is the nose that makes me me. That the off centred mouth makes the smile that shines each day.

I might be borderline when it comes to my weight; underweight to ideal. But this is the body that allows me to move and have a shape others dream of.

To love myself no matter what, I should disregard what the official scale says. I know when I feel healthy and good about my body. I don’t need an aim to lose weight or one to gain. I need to aim to eat healthily, enjoy daily movement and to know that I’m beautiful no matter what.

Watched: Dracula Untold > 3.5 out of 5
Safe House > 2.5 out of 5

Life, Writing

How do I build up my strength?

I want to build up my upper body strength. I’ve been told previously that I have a muscle imbalance in my arms and shoulders. I’m not 100% sure what this means but I was told exercise is what I need to do.

Finding the right exercise that will build up my strength; I’m not sure where to start. I struggle to lift easy things in life sometimes and I struggle at work with some of the manual and handling tasks which is starting to cause agro in my back.

I need/want to do something that I’m not causing my body harm. Especially with my family health that can be hereditary.

Health, Life, Writing

Feeling Better

What did I say about being fine in the morning? After sleeping in till 10am I was fine. The sleep helped bring my energy back.

My celiac test results are not back yet either. I had my ultrasound too. All three tests came back as a normal result. Which is good but doesn’t explain my stomach pains.

The estate agents rang to give me an update. The vendor has given all but the fixture and fitting sheet back. So we’re still waiting. Something is happening but I don’t wanna look elsewhere for somewhere when I love this house.

Watched: Casino Royale (2006) > 2.5 out of 5

Health, Life, Writing

Not Feeling too Good

I woke up feeling down from the night before. It’s affected my mood along with the heat its effect on my stomach. Its been playing up today.

Today was Dave’s Cousin’s little boys christening. Here’s me meeting them for the first time and it didn’t help with me feeling like this. I spent half the time in the bathroom. I also didn’t go to my in-laws for dinner.

I thought it might be best to call in sick to work tomorrow. I don’t wanna lose out on the money but if it’s anything other then the heat I don’t wanna infect my customers. Most likely I’ll be fine when I wake in the morning.

Health, Life, Writing

A Little Under the Weather

Two more working days to go before our annual leave starts. It’ll be good to recuperate. I’ve got that lovely cold, that’s going around. Plus my stomach is playing up. I’ve an embarrassing problem on top of that.

I’ve a blood test next week, an ultrasound scan to book and I’m to have my urine dipped.

I’m sat here wanting to crawl into bed and not get out again.

Maybe that’ll get it all better?

Nah, didn’t think so.

House update: Apparently the vendor solicitors have sent over the draft contract and something else, I can’t remember the name of, but still wanting for property information forms. They’ve started. I just have to wait a little longer.

I just hope I sleep tonight, better than the last. It took me a long time to fall asleep. I even gave up and read my book at one point. It’s not a thrilling book, maybe that’s what’s helping me sleep?

Tomorrow is another day. It’ll be a new start. Let’s hope I’ll be able to breathe through my nose.


Health, Life, Mental Health, Writing

My Mental Health is a Major Part of Me

We’ve started doggie sitting for the in-laws. Well, this evening really. We’ve both been working during the day.

When I had finished, knowing I needed to get our bags before going to my in-laws, I was getting stressed. Trying to rush or having that rushed feeling within me, preventing myself from being calm. To enjoy my evening off with Dave and the dogs.

After sorting ourselves out and having dinner, we took the dogs for a walk. It made me feel like we should do this more often both with or without the dogs. Especially during good weather.

Spend more time outside. I want to be healthy, to travel and to make a difference in the world. I can’t do that if I’m sat inside watching telly all the time, can I?

Being outside will keep me fit. Not just physically but mentally too. My mental health is a major part of me. I am the one who needs to take action to maintain my wellbeing. No one can do it for me or help me without me helping myself first.

Goals, Life, Writing

Giddy Moment!!

Giddy Moment!!

After seeing the financial advisor and being told we’re in a position to get a mortgage. I’ve been doing a giddy dance.

We can start looking for houses.

Me being me can’t wait. I’ve started looking. We’ve found 4 maybes currently in the areas we’re looking for our price. One, unfortunately, is under offer. The other 3 we’re waiting for word back from the estate agents.

Dave’s dad has put me on a downer though. Apparently, he can’t get his head around how we can afford a mortgage.

Thankfully, I wasn’t there at the time of him and Dave talking. I’m slightly annoyed as well. Dave’s dad even suggested going to see a mortgage advisor. I’m gonna message Dave’s mum tomorrow to see about going around the evening before we go on holiday.

My new patient appointment went well. I even had a phone call from the doctor about my anti-depressant. At this new doctors, it can’t be put on repeat. Neither can my pill, so the nurse has booked me a review for that one.

I suppose it’s quite a good thing really. People can’t abuse medications and the doctors save money on medications that aren’t needed. Not all will think this way. But I agree with this doctors system.

At my old doctor’s, I could just get my repeats without talking to a doctor. It’s amazing how each NHS doctors are so different from one another. Even when in the same county.