Life, Personal Development, Stratejoy

HoCo 2018: ‘I’m Making Progress’

I’ve done better with this No Telly Tuesday; I haven’t forgotten about it. I’ve been productive at Getting Some Shit done. I’ve also popped into my new job to hand in some last pieces of paperwork. Hopefully, my last reference is going to be sorted too. I have everything crossed that I’ll finally get a final official job offer.


HoCo 2018 Day 2

I asked my grandad about the exercise bike last night. He said I can get rid. I’m gonna see if I can get some pennies for it and if nothing comes from that take it to the charity shop. I’ve also decided to declutter my file box for the activation challenge. It’s where I put things I need to sort out another time. It’s like my physical to-do-list but my digital to-do-list gets more attention.

I listened to the first guest interview but listening is a strong word. I was getting distracted by other things. I couldn’t or should I say I struggled on a general basis to sit and just listen. I ended up pausing at each distraction so I couldn’t miss anything that was being said. Being in the now and listening is something I need to work on. Even so, I did take things from Jen Louden call:

I used to do monthly updates but I’ve lapsed on these in the past view months; maybe coming up with my own tracking review each month will put me back on track on my yearly goals to have a check in with myself in between each of the quarterly reviews. I could use my diary as my weekly check-in? Give myself a reality check to what appointments, work and to-dos that need doing and the time I have to do the work on my goals. Allowing myself to schedule and focus on some me time.

What I really need to do is celebrate the good things, what goes right when a goal is finished.

I need to be aware of constructing identity. Jen explains this is where current desires are being looked through the lens of the past. For example, using I should have done this etc. But also be aware of what future identities like visualisations that are sabotaging the present. Practice focusing on the now; maybe with meditation. I need to let go of the past and future energies that may not be possible right now to prevent my NOW identity from growing.

I also need to figure out what is good enough for me. What does enoughness look or feel like to me? I believe I hold my enoughness at too high a level. Sabotaging my satisfaction and giving too strong intentions. I need to let go of expectations. That the goals I haven’t reached this year are still a vision, just because I didn’t get there this year doesn’t mean I can’t try again next year.

While writing up these answers I’ve realised that I’ve got some responses for my reflection challenge; things I want to leave behind in 2018. I’ve still yet to figure out how I’m gonna do in terms of ritual.

I feel that I’ve taken this HoCo this year more on board in the last two days then I did for the whole of the first year of doing it. I’m making progress!!

Life, Personal Development, Stratejoy

HoCo 2018 Begins

Today’s the start of The Holiday Council with Stratejoy. I’ve done it for the past two years and feel I could continue for as long as Molly keeps registration open. This year I am going to write my responses in my journal and any reflections from outside the workbook here too. I wanna try to get the full wack of my deep journalling as possible. In three weeks time this years theme word, JOY, will be replaced with my 2019 theme word.

Week 1 Connection Challenge:

2018 has been a year of growth and taking the theme of the year more seriously. Trying to fully incorporate it into my life. Having done this more often them my year of CHERISHing is what I’m most proud of. I’ve brought JOY into my life; I’ve gone on a group holiday with Dave and friends, I’ve visited family – near and far. I’ve been saying yes to new experiences and being with others. I’ve thought more about what I’m doing in my life that brings me JOY.

When using the word surprised for 2018, I’m not sure what comes up for me. Maybe it’s that I’m still not always true to myself and still hold back on what I want to do and say. I’ve come along way in my later 20’s. But I’ve still a way to go to be me entirely. I’d like to figure out how to get myself closer to me. Aiming to know who I am to live my 30’s to the fullest. I’ve just under 3 years to get there.


The 2nd and 3rd challenges I need to think about what and how I’m gonna do them.

The activation challenge – I need to figure out where my decluttering is gonna be. What is gonna have the most impact on creating a fresh new space for the new year?

Most of our belongings are in our bedroom at my parents or in Daves old room at his parents. Then our house just comes as it is. I can’t clean that until the plasterer has finished. Back to our bedroom at my parents’ house, it is. One thing in front of me is the exercise bike my grandparents gave me. I’m mainly using it as a clothes rack. I’ve used it a few times since April, but I’ve no desire to get on it in a hurry. Being sat around isn’t enough motivation for me to get on and exercise. I’d much rather get on the yoga mat, that is currently under the bed. It’s something that keeps coming to my mind. I think I’m gonna ask my grandad about it to see what he wants to do. That can be part of my activation; I feel once it’s in our house and in one of the spare rooms, it’s just gonna be sat there gathering dust. Our room does need a good tidy. Maybe I could do this as well?

The reflection challenge – What do I want to let go of and what do I want to keep from 2018? How am I going to portray this?


If anything new comes to me following this I think I’ll write it in a reflection. I should have prompts more often. I write a lot more and on a deeper level than just how my day went.

Life, Personal Development, Stratejoy, Writing

A Mini Q4 Review 2018

This week off hasn’t felt like one to me. I love to help but I’m not feeling the way I want to. I’m tired, frustrated and just waiting to have the opportunity to have days where they are for me to do what I want 100% of the time. Because I’m putting others first, I’m not doing all that I want to do. That’s including with my goals. I started out the last quarter of the goal really well at Getting Shit Done.

I have been doing things slowly the last month or so but other things have taken over. My prioritising skills haven’t been up to scratch. I’ve done odd deep journalling. I suppose the challenge is caring for my grandparents. Having to keep my mouth closed to prevent my grandad becoming upset with us but it’s risking my grandma. We’re figuring out what we need to say with the right words.

Having this on my plate and all the other things in my life, they have taken priority and my self-care and the things I need to do are put to one side or forgotten. Joy is something I have experienced this quarter. But mainly its been put to one side also. Taking memories where I can but being fully present has been hard. Lively I have not been. I am craving calm, simplicity, freedom and streamline.

Life, Mental Health

‘Its not something I wanna do’

I’ve had periods of ups and downs with my energy. I again struggled to get to sleep and if I woke I couldn’t get back to sleep.

I had a pick me up when Dave and I went to the animal shelter. I didn’t get chased by Blossom or the Cockerel.

We watched a film together once home and shopping was done. I feel like I’m coming down with something but don’t think that’s anything but stress.

Dave and I then went to the pantomime; Cinderella. I really enjoyed it and it took my mind off things for a while. I just hope I’m coping well rather then going further down to where I need to go back on anti-depressents. It’s not something I wanna do.

Life

Getting Closer to the New Job

I woke feeling sick and with a headache. I slept a little better but it still took me a couple hours to get to sleep. I’ve been a little sorry for myself. More so because I dreamt that my grandma died. It felt so real it was horrible to have done so. I usually just curl up in bed all day. I did do this a bit but I made myself still do some of the jobs I had to do.

We also still went to the cinema. As it turned out it helped me forget for a couple hours which took the sickness away. I’m definitely taking everything hard and stressing over it all.

I have good news that my current employer sent my reference and I’ve a time on Tuesday to go into the new place to give, hopefully the last of my documents.

Not good financially but I’ve more time on my hands next week. I’ve only been given 11 hours work. So it’ll be good in the respect I feel I need a holiday even though I’m on annual leave this week.


Watched: Gladiator > 2 out of 5

Robin Hood (2018) > 4 out of 5

Life, Relationship

Happy 4th Anniversary

Happy 4th Anniversary to us. 4 years; I cannot believe it. 2 years ago we got engaged and in 18 months we’ll be getting married. It’s been a big year for us. We’ve bought a house that we’re renovating. We’ve booked our wedding; making bigger commitments to one another.

We had a lay in. I temporarily forgot it was Tuesday and finished an episode of telly. Dave told me off and that was all the telly I watched today.

We came home after finishing puppy sitting for the in-laws, able to exchange our presents. Dave got me Noel Fitzpatrick autobiography and the Harry Potter expansion box. I got him the new Game of Thrones book.

We had a trip to the house. Need to ring the skip people as it’s still there. We also need to collect some more plaster for the plasterer. 2 bedrooms are now complete.

I also sorted out my car insurance it was up for renewal and they wanted me to pay an extra 300 a year. Not a chance.

The new job got back to me on yesterday’s replies. I think I’m gonna wait till Friday then hand my notice in. I could also cancel my notice closer to December if necessary.

I’ve spent some of the afternoon on Spyro; sods law it fucked up and lost my saved data. I had to start all over again. I have no idea what happened but anyway I got on with it and gained 16% back.

Now I’ve to finish packing and get to my grandparents, it my turn again to stay over.

Life

‘I’m not a waiting person’

Another relaxing day, I took the dogs for a walk, watched a film, went home to sort my dogs out. Then I took my grandad shopping and to his after op appointment. He’s doing well. My grandma has been a bit moody over the last few days so that’s been fun.

Once back, Dave and I spent the evening in front of the telly again. I also received an update from my new employer. They are missing some things so I’ve been chasing these up. Hopefully, by the end of the week, these will be sorted.

I get apprehensive when I’m waiting for these things to happen. It raises my anxiety levels a bit. Fingers crossed it all goes to plan.


Watched: The Princess Switch > 4 out of 5
How it Ends > 2.5 out of 5