I really can talk about saying goodbye to wardrobes.

Another step towards moving home. My wardrobes have been taken down into parts. Ready to be taken away tomorrow. I know it’s a wardrobe but I’ll miss it. A big corner walk-in wardrobe. Without it, my room looks bigger. You can tell it hasn’t been moved since it came. The wall behind it is a different shade of purple.

I’m glad to have had some time to relax today. I spent most of the afternoon sleeping. I have a lovely head cold. It’s taken the majority of my energy. Gotta get rested up. Get through tomorrow.

Saying Goodbye – 2018 Courageous Living Planner

At the start of the year, I started the 2018 Courageous Living Planner. I enjoyed reading what Kate Swoboda wrote. I connected with what she had to say. I found her evaluation tool helpful.

At the beginning of the year my satisfaction of the following areas of my life was:

Family and Friends: 5
Career: 5
Money: 3
Physical Health: 6
Home/Physical Environment: 5
Fun and Recreation: 4

Right now I believe some have reduced but I’m hopeful after the move some will go back over even get higher.

After telling the truth from some questions asked I came up with my Most Courageous Self goals:

  1. Incorporate music into my life daily
  2. Being in and seeing the natural world
  3. Achieving and being apart of big dreams

The first couple of months went well on completing the monthly questions. Even up to this month. But once I’d answered the questions I put the planner down not to be looked at until the next month.

I suppose the questions helped me to see my life in a new light but that 10-minute answering hasn’t been helping me move forward. I like my MCS goals. I feel they’re a big part of my big dream goals.

That and with The Holiday Council work I do, the planner doesn’t seem to be needed anymore.

I’ve made the decision to give the planner a miss now. It isn’t being a part of my life in the way it should, so I need to say goodbye to it. Focus on the outlets I already have and that are working.

Due to it being a planner I hadn’t looked through to the months ahead. Having done this now I feel it was the right decision to say goodbye to the planner. I’m not loosing out by saying goodbye. I’m not wasting money. It was free and a little bit of ink. Being paper I’m able to recycle what I’m saying goodbye too.

Is there anything you feel you need to say goodbye too?

Watched: Numb > 2.5 out of 5
Walking Tall > 4 out of 5
The Levelling > 1 out of 5

Are you being yourself?

Growing up, even still to this day people tell me to be yourself. In my 26 years of life so far, is it the ‘norm’ to know who I am, where I wanna be and what my life is gonna hold?
My mind processed all the information around me. I either see and understand it or I don’t.
I know what my past journey has been like. I’ve had ups and downs. In and out of the doctors, with this or that wrong with me. I’ve gained and lost friends. I’ve lost myself and found myself again. My anxiety, my depression has been ruling me. Anti-depressants within my system.
I’ve backed out. I’ve run away. I’ve laughed. I’ve cried. I’ve lied. I’ve been kind. I’ve been cruel. I’ve been many more a type of person.
Do I know who I am? Not entirely. I know what I feel, what I think and a path is in view. My past doesn’t define me. Yes, it is my past. It always will be. My past isn’t who I am today.
I can tell you some of my likes, dislikes. My aspirations. The person I want you to see me as. The legacy I wanna leave behind. That’s only a part of me.
My thoughts have been rolling around my head, all my life. Thoughts, I’ve had to deal with. Thoughts that have stopped me doing or saying something. Thoughts that have been positive but have been pushed to one side, hiding in the darkness of the negativity bullying their way forward.
My thoughts are just that: thoughts.
They are balloons floating by. Until one keeps getting bigger, ready to burst, needing my attention. After letting out some air, the balloon is safe to continue, floating, gently over the horizon.
Thoughts are transient. Short-lived. Thoughts come and go. These thoughts have been weathering a storm, bursting for too long.
That gentle flow towards the horizon, the calm, lightening up my days. I’m becoming conscious of myself and the world I’m in. Starting to live for me. Not for others and certainly not for my thoughts.
My mind is open to endless possibilities. Insights.
I can’t tell the future. Tomorrow I’ll be myself and more. Continuing to grow each day. My consciousness emerging in all areas, freeing my mind of thoughts. Allowing me to shine through.

9 Months of Writing

There are times in my life I feel I have a mental block. This block for me is like hitting a brick wall. Not knowing what to do, say or write.

When this happens, with my development, I feel this block is draining away slightly. I’ve been journaling for 9 months straight. Writing I believe has helped me to battle the block.

I find there are times this block is a sudden hit in the face. So I feel what I say, do or write is not good enough.

I’ve become to accept that everything I do is good enough. Perfect isn’t something to strive for me. It brings more personal battles then it does being accepting of the person I am and growing to be.

Watched: Geostorm > 5 out of 5

Fareham: Day 5

It was our last day today. Which meant saying goodbye and thank you before the drive home. I will miss them and treasure this getaway.

The drive was alright, no hold ups and stopped for a little break halfway. One good thing about the long drive meant I could listen to my iPod more. With Dave writing, I was able to sort while listening. I now have a list of song that doesn’t resonate with me anymore, for me to remove.

At times we listened to Daves iPod, completely different music to mind but there was a couple songs I liked enough to go on a list to be put onto my iPod.

Back home, now with only 1 day left of our annual leave, a bit of catching up to do before going back to work. I’m gonna miss the break but I have memories fro my scrapbook and have these blog posts as memories too.

Excitement for Tomorrow

We’ve had a productive day. We had a list of things we needed to do before we go away tomorrow. I’m glad the snow has gone. I just have to battle to wet weather.

Tomorrow we travel down south to my relatives for 4 nights. It’s been a good couple of years since we saw them last. I’m really looking forward to having a holiday home away from home.

Watched: The Greatest Showman > 5 out of 5

You Never Know What’s Around the Corner

Days are fast. In a blink of an eye, many opportunities, memories and everyday life pass by without being noticed.

Take each second, make the most of it. Everything can change, good or bad. Life is gonna pass by.

Open your eyes. See and hear what’s in front of you. You never know what’s around the corner.

Watched: Deliver us from Evil > 4.5 out of 5